hard days suck HARD.

Today really sucked.

Like... really sucked. I'd try to put a positive spin on it, but really - it just SUCKED.

My beloved dog, Huck, bit someone at the farm yesterday, and I didn't realize how serious it was until today. Even though he is the absolute MOST submissive, docile, gentle dog on the face of the earth, Huck did some very serious damage to one of my co-workers during the process of him trying to restrain my dog yesterday :(. I still don't know all the details, and I honestly can't help but still believe that my dog is good at heart even in the face of all this, but I'm horrified about what happened. Mortified, really, and so, so, so sad.

It's really been eating at me today... that and the fact that I'm also feeling stressed/overwhelmed about our current pest problems in the garden, and the fact that I'm leaving in less than a week to go to Florida, and then leaving a week from Saturday to go to ITALY, not to return until the beginning of July.

However - there are, of course, some positive notes to bring up after getting all that off my chest. Our first cucumbers just came in, and our first zinnias are beginning to bloom <3. I am THRILLED about this. It'll only be a matter of time until the whole lower garden is in full bloom - zinnias, sunflowers, cosmos... I just can't wait. Also, I made a really thorough garden schedule for when I'm gone, and also a master list of all of our crops, their locations, basic needs, harvesting instructions, and storage directions. Making the list made me feel really knowledgeable, which is always a plus :). Also - I started cleaning out our chaotic greenhouse today, fertilized our up-&-coming herb and flower plants (more zinnias, basil, thyme, sage, savory, and cilantro), and collected all my tools inside the greenhouse. So... essentially - a very mixed review of the day. I'm destroyed about Huck, but I think I need to also give myself a pat on the back for what I am doing right. Which is more than I usually give myself credit for, I must say.

More to come, & I'll leave you with this:

"Last Night the Rain Spoke to Me"
by Mary Oliver

Last night
the rain
spoke to me
slowly, saying,
what joy
to come falling
out of the brisk cloud,
to be happy again
in a new way
on the earth!
That's what it said
as it dropped,
smelling of iron,
and vanished
like a dream of the ocean
into the branches
and the grass below.
Then it was over.
The sky cleared.
I was standing
under a tree.
The tree was a tree
with happy leaves,
and I was myself,
and there were stars in the sky
that were also themselves
at the moment
at which moment
my right hand
was holding my left hand
which was holding the tree
which was filled with stars
and the soft rain -
imagine! imagine!
the long and wonderous journeys
still to be ours.

I hope that, by reading these dear words, your own lives will become endowed with this kind of sweetness. I love you <3.
- H